What Are You Giving Up For Lent?

lint 300x224 What Are You Giving Up For Lent?

No, not this lint. The other one with the ashes and the crosses and the palm leaves stuff

Are you a believer of a faith that participates in Lent?  No?  Then you don’t need to be here for any more of this, check back tomorrow for some other stupidity.  In the event that you do follow this tradition, and I don’t, I thought I’d write about it anyways.

The traditional purpose of Lent is the penitential preparation of the believer—through prayer, penance, repentance, almsgiving, and self-denial. Its institutional purpose is heightened in the annual commemoration of Holy Week, marking the Death and Resurrection of Jesus, which recalls the events of the Passion of Christ on Good Friday, which then culminates in the celebration on Easter Sunday of the Resurrection of Jesus Christ.

Thanks Wikipedia!  If it’s on Wikipedia, you know it’s 100% accurate.

Anyhow, during Lent many people commit to fasting or giving up certain luxuries as penitence.  I get it, it’s a form of respect and a show of faith.  Good on you.

But for me?  I couldn’t do it.  I’m not that strong willed.  Fasting?  FASTING?  Have you seen me?  Look at the top of the page, that’s just 1/3 of my entire manly, fur-covered being.  Fasting for me would be skipping my in between meal meals.  No way in hell.  Sorry, not happening.

Also, I don’t live a luxurious life.  I’m on this machine for upwards of 12 hours a day working, or Googling naked pictures of the Golden Girls, and the rest of my time is spent with my kids and my 2 hours maximum of TV on any given day.  I have no luxuries.  Unless you count beer as a luxury.  If you do, you’re out of  your mind.  It’s a mild form of medication that allows me to function in this house full of children who insist that I’m their father.

So no, I couldn’t do Lent.  I could maybe spare some change on my way to the Waffle House or something to help with your building fund, but beyond that, count me out.  And I find it funny that the only time really “show their faith” is during an event like Lent.  You don’t see them trying to prove themselves to be better people in the middle of June, at the beach in line for a sno cone.  In fact, they become the polar opposite of what their faith tells them they should be.

Love they neighbor, people, LOVE THY NEIGHBOR!  Quit cutting in line to get the cherry sno cone because it’s hot and you think you have a right to get yours before I get mine.  And for pete’s sake, make sure you know which flavor you want BEFORE you get to the counter.  This isn’t a life altering decision.  Choosing lime over sour apple isn’t going to alter the course of your life in any meaningful way.  And so help me, if you ask about gluten-free flavorings, you’ll be meeting your God sooner than you planned.

All that aside, Happy Lent everybody!

  • http://twitter.com/fumbledreturns Fumbled Returns

    For us, lent means no alcohol or desserts, which means there is so much pre-lent consumption that fat Tuesday starts on Saturday!