To be fair, I didn’t buy this pay per view event, and after reading all of the recaps and play-by-plays of the show, I’m REALLY goddamn glad I didn’t waste my forty-five bucks.
It was doomed from the start, this show wasn’t built up with any storylines, angles or feuds that would entice anyone to drop cash on it. At least, not anyone over the age of 15. I mean, honestly, who cares about a Cena vs. General Manager match? The Divas division is always horrible (thanks Vince!) and that Fatal Fourway abomination reeked of stupid if you ask me.
Here’s what they had advertised:
- Over The Limit Pre-Show Special on Youtube – Zack Ryder vs. Kane
- Tag Team Championship Match – Kofi Kingston/R-Truth vs. Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger
- Divas Championship Match – Layla vs. Beth Phoneix
- World Heavyweight Championship Match – Started off as Sheamus vs. Alberto Del Rio, then morphed into a Fatal Fourway with Chris Jericho and Randy Orton added in
- WWE Championship Match – CM Punk vs Daniel Bryan
- General Management vs. The Help match – John Cena vs. John Laurinaitis
Now, seriously, read through that list of crap and tell me which matches appeal to you? Most likely the Fatal Fourway and the WWE Championship match right? And if you’re anything like me, you saw through that grab for star power with the Fatal Fourway being announced.
For the rest of the card? Oh, who gives a shit. A nearly 50 year old GM who hasn’t had a match in over a decade vs. a ten-time WWE Champion still in his prime? What’s that? Interference to help him cheat to a win? You don’t say! Blech.
The Divas division has been effectively spayed and neutered by the WWE. It’s an afterthought at best and usually used to pad out the event for time. Also, so old man Vince can get his jollies watching very fit women roll around for a minute or two wearing as little clothing as humanly possible.
So, to fill out Sunday’s card, they added the following matches:
- A Battle Royal with the winner getting to choose a title match for either the U.S. Title or the Intercontinental Title.
- Brodus Clay vs. The Miz. As much as I love the Funkasaurus, this was stupid to throw in there.
- Ryback vs. Camacho. Camacho? Ugh.
And chances are they added these matches because they knew CM Punk and Daniel Byran would literally kill each other to steal the show if given more than 30 minutes to work in the ring.
They literally could have sold more PPV buys with having ONLY that match featured as a one-hour time limit iron-man match, where there was no clear winner and they had to carry their feud over into the next PPV event. How easy is this to book?
But no, they shoved more garbage down our throats than they usually do on Monday Night Raw and here we are wondering what in the f*ck just happened. Why bother with a PPV event that isn’t going to sell and that you’re not going to build towards? It’s a PPV for the sake of having a PPV.
As an added bonus, July marks the start of THREE HOURS OF GODDAMNED RAW EVERY WEEK. Miller Brewing is going to freakin’ love that. I will personally be responsible for pushing their stock five points higher on Monday nights alone.
I would imagine you’d like some breakdown on the matches, the results at the very least? Fine, click the next page and I’ll give you a breakdown.
